People will always tell you to be proud of yourself. They will tell you that you should celebrate your accomplishments. Celebrate who you are. I am sure through your whole life your family, friends, teachers, bosses, etc. have encouraged you to like who you are. They wanted you to be happy and celebrate your life.
They may have told you that this may bother some people. That this won’t get you very popular with others. To ignore them and keep being proud of you. The people who love you were giving you solid advice. You absolutely should celebrate yourself and your life. Pay no attention to the people who are upset by that. But there is something they often fail to mention to you. Something that will get you a long way in life and in keeping the good vibes you have found.
While you are celebrating, make sure you are watching your people.
Let this sink in and then let me explain.
The masks come off
People will reveal themselves when they think you are preoccupied. While you are happy, living your life. Watch the people close to you. Do they genuinely seem happy for you? Or are they cutting you down every chance they get? If most of the time a person seems to be happy for you, then they probably are.
However, if you consistently catch an attitude from your friend any time you mention a positive event in your life, you may want to re-evaluate your relationship. You are right in celebrating yourself. You just need to make sure the other people in your life want to celebrate you too! When you are happy, these little faces and remarks from people are often overlooked. But this is the key time to know if you have the right people in your inner circle.
When things are going bad it is easy to be there for someone. If you are struggling, then the other person is in a better position at that time. Or even if they aren’t, at least you are down with them. A lot of people also just like the drama that comes with struggling. These are not the type of people you want surrounding you.
Signs of a Fake Supporter
- They call or come around less when you are happy.
- When you try to talk about something positive, they instantly change the subject.
- They make passive comments cutting down you or your success.
- You hear from others they have been cutting down you or your success.
- They try to maintain a sense of superiority over you.
- They regularly bring up things from your past they know you have an issue with.
- They discount your progress.
You do not want to waste your time trying to save relationships with these kinds of people. The people who are going to get you where you want to be will also be too busy celebrating their lives to have the energy to try to discount others. Just as misery loves company, so does happiness. People who love themselves and their lives are sometimes just harder to come by sadly. But when you do, make sure you invest in those relationships because they are the ones worth having and putting the work into.
Some of the best people in your life may be happy for you, but deeply struggling themselves. This may make it seem like they want negativity for you even though they don’t. Make sure you take into account the circumstances people are going through before writing them off. Take time to help build them up too.
So how do you celebrate with awareness, without it killing your spirit?
I know having to pay attention to other people’s actions when you are riding high sounds like a huge mood killer. But it doesn’t have to be. You should still be spending majority of your time just living and being confident in yourself. Chances are you have already noticed some of the things I mentioned occurring and you were just brushing them off.
You can still let the person’s behaviors pass without any negativity. In no way do you owe them some big, dramatic explanation of why you create distance. That person can just lose their place in your life. Just keep moving on. In fact, figuring out if you have any of these people in your life and removing them will keep contributing to your continued celebration.
Share the Knowledge
So you know everyone says you should pay attention to the people who are there when you need them. But what they should also say is that you should be paying just as much attention to the people who are there when you don’t. They will be the ones who help perpetuate your success and give you reasons to keep celebrating!